haiz.. bored as hell now man... but orso too tired to go out, or at least jio pple out haha. might hav considered if someone asked me out, but as usual, nobody did *sobs* hahahaha
brought up my 'potential for hair-loss' during dinner with my family today haha. my dad's certain i hav high testosterone, with my acitve sebum glands and body hair. i dun deny it, i'm VERY MANLY wat! hahahah tho some might disagree *ahem* he's considering starting me on medication to reduce my testosterone levels. the med's meant to curb balding but i think for my case its more for the achne heheh. thing is, none of his frens or himself hav used the med for achne treatment haha. i'm worried if there are any side effects manz... dun wanna grow tits or wat hahaha. according to him ard 1% will expierence low sex drive. i could do wif dat, i'm an ANIMAL man! wahahaha but really not too sure abt hormone treatment, its considerably new, long term side effects aren't dat well studied yet. juz look at the poor body builders who experimented wif HGH (human growth hormone) developing tits and all. i'm serious. haha.
Life in army is headed down hill yet again. sigh... its not so much the fact dat im busy wif the Ex Wallaby preps, having to do OT/report to camp early etc or the increased resposibilites placed on my shoulders recently. Its the morale of the camp, very depressing. sigh, especially for my dear fren Ronald. He's one of the few pple i trust in the MT line, a great fren, and its hurts to see him in this situation now. he's undoubtly been the most suay NSF spec, keep gettin aimed by dat BASTARD. and i dun see how it can be fair? Ronald works hard, takes all the shit wif little complaint, yet this is how they treat him? hey, we all make mistakes. most sickening thing is, his mistakes are trivial in my eyes. like me, he's an attached personnel. juz pisses me off, when we attached personnel, slave our asses off for another unit trying our best to be as professional and responsible as we can. showing good work ethic and at least contribute to the MT line. but this is how they repay us? this is how they show good faith? fuck u. its such 'hospitality' dat makes us feel at home. no wonder we all wanna return to our parent units. futhermore, the timing of it all is juz damn bad la... he's visibly shaken and drained. i can only hope and pray for justice.
shagged shagged shagged!!! did OT once again.. its becoming NT (normal time) haha.. today's OT jia lat man... went to wash 5 tons!!! finished soaking wet and with dirt all over... yucks... best thing is didn't have a change of clothes. heng, i drove to camp today, if not dunno how i can book out. (need to be in uniform to book out by foot) reached home ard 845pm... dats wif driving, imagine wat time i wud be back had i taken public transport! sigh.. same thing tmr, gotta wake up at 5am. this time no car tho... sucks... haiz.. tmr was supposed to be a rest day... initially it was only today, fri and sat.. yes, SAT! but now, i need to be early tmr as well, making it 4 consecutive days! plus OT somemore... no wonder i hav such bad pimple outbreak now haha...
feelin alert now, but gotta slp now, if not tmr i'll juz die. ciao.
| How to make a Brennan |
Ingredients:
3 parts intelligence
3 parts brilliance
3 parts empathy |
Method:
Blend at a low speed for 30 seconds. Add a little emotion if desired! |
5:42 pm;
T o R + 0 i S e
Tuesday, August 16, 2005
hmmm... i've decided to be more candid abt my personal life and my opinions on my blog from now onwards. In the past, i was very wary of wat i should and should not write, always guarded, always worried i mite offend/disappoint/embarass someone, afraid of the zero control over my audience and the judgements dat may follow. But i've come to realise that i shudn't censor wat i want to say. its my blog. not saying i'm goin to reveal all my secrets, give up my privacy. juz goin to stay true to the purpose of this blog, a medium for me to vent my frustrations, release my anger, make confessions, find solace in writing. i can't be the selfless Mr. Perfect all the time.
P.s. changed my blog song. So in love with this song now... i can put in on repeat and nvr get sick of it, well at least for now. hahaha no idea wat the title means tho, 'the blower's daughter'??? *raises eyebrow*
11:46 pm;
T o R + 0 i S e
Sunday, August 14, 2005
bloggin from camp again... but this time, via a SAF laptop wahahaha... a first, so cool! hehehe... anyways juz wanna write abt last nite's, no wrong, this morning's dream. haha, i dreamt i was dating Steph Sun! a prettier version of course, heheheh... i wud analyse that my sub-conscious choose Steph Sun probably cuz i heard her song last before fallin asleep and the whole dating senario, was simply the released of suppressed emotions. ok, enough of that nerdy shit hahahaha... the dream was very vivid, plus i made an effort to remember heheh. it felt real, it had history... i felt emotionally connected. it was like watching a movie. my dream had great cinematography! haha.. a rarity. usually its blurred, incoherent or simply illogical.
anyways, here's how it went.
The history:
It seems Steph and I once dated a long time ago. Before or after she became famous? i dun noe.. my dream didn't specify hahaha. So, somehow, our paths crossed and we got in touched again. (charlotte)
Fallin in love again:
it started harmlessly enough. juz two old flames catching up on old times. Soon we re-discover each other, nostaglia sets in (wendy)and i'm remindered of how we share the same interests, have similar character traits (teresa)
Making my move:
After a day of great fun together packed with great conversations, lots of laughter etc So we were walking back to her place, we were intimate, i had my arms around her. blissful. i looked into her eyes and it struck me. She's the one for me, I love her(plus she's a millionare, big plus hahaha). And i noe she feels the same, i can see it in her eyes. I kiss her passionately on the lips. i pull away, breathless. gazing into her eyes yet again, marvelling at her beauty. I bring my face close to her again, our noses caress and i give her a gentle peck on her lips before we resume our walk home. (absolute fantasy haha)
The infidelity:
I come down to her place for a surprise. Surprise her i did. two of her girl frens receive me at the door and usher me to the living room. They tell me Steph is having a shower and scurry off to her room to get her. but in truth, Steph actually spent the nite with some boy toy and her frens quickly alerted her! Hearing much comotion from her room, i curiously open the door to see a boy in his boxers looking for a place to hide! But before i could rush in to kick his ass, her two frens rush out of the room and began to come on to me. Running their hands all over my body, stripping off their clothes as well as mine hahaha... (rui chan) I resisted but my efforts were slowly wailing, then i wake up! hahaha...
Yeah i noe, ending sucks... weird too... maybe its a message, my dream girl isn't goin to be faithful! hahahah i'm such a loser... oh wells, its juz a dream.
11:05 am;
T o R + 0 i S e
My trip down to my usual hair salon has left me a little worried! My hairstylist handed to me a brochure after i made payment. didn't think anything of it, juz tot it was a promo for male hair products. but when i got home and properly read it, realised it was targeting men with hair thinning problems! My initial thoughts were 'doesn't concern me. i've got such thick hair!' but after reading through it, i realised i have many of the warning signs listed. such as: pimples pn face, back and extremities. excessive oily scalp. not sure if i can fall under the excessive body hair category, but i'm quite hairy hahah... and i'm not sure if i have excessive hair loss (over 50 per day), how to keep count? haha the only thing i lack is excessively thin-lookig areas throught the scalp or any visible signs of balding! hahaha... how man? am i goin to bald soon? i find it very hard to believe, i mean no receding hair line etc... but im definitely goin to be more aware from now on. not goin to scuff at the idea dat i'll bald anymore.
12:21 am;
T o R + 0 i S e
Wednesday, August 10, 2005
Hooray! I passed my driving test! yippie! hahhaha.. So proud of myself, wahahaha.. tho i only juz passed... not forgetting dat i oredi hav expierence frm the army hehehe... extra happy cuz it came cheap! abt $750+ only... 11 lessons! hehehe...
but the stupid bbdc had to dampen my spirits by pushin my patience to the limit! my test took me 1/2 an hr while it took me 2Hrs to settle the admin stuff and close my acc... wah lau... make me wait so long juz to collect a mere $3.75! too much la... give priority to newbie students... i mean.. its so much faster to close an acc den to start one, yet we hav to wait! basket! In the end, made me late for my appt... so paisey, our first meetin den make her wait sooo long... den in the end nvr buy the insurance from her... so sorry Ada...
Sianz.. back to work tmr again! sigh...
11:30 pm;
T o R + 0 i S e
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
Dead tired rite now... almost feel breathless hahaha... damn it la.. gotta start working out again... a mere two month lay off has oredi resulted in me feelin so drained after juz one afternoon of futsal! Feel like goin to bed this moment... but i won't. simply too early.. think i'll juz laze in front of the tv later hahaha
Tmr i'll be taking my driving test! hahaha.. but strangely i'm not nervous at all at the moment... maybe i'll be shit scared tmr afternoon hehehe... maybe its cuz i've been driving in the army... not so 'newbie'. can still remember how nervous i was before my military driving test, felt so unprepared and inexpierenced. but den again, im not sayin i feel super confident for tmr's test. My driving ain't dat gd! haha.. but really hope i pass... dun wanna waste anymore money liao... gettin broke oredi hahah.. it'll be best if i get a female tester, den can work my charms on her wahahaha!
10:10 pm;
T o R + 0 i S e
